Salut!
Like I said in one my articles, I still believe trust is earned. My husband believes its a free gift of sacrifice. I believe your question now to me is , ''how are you guys coping?'' or ''are you guys not agreeing as a couple?'' Well, we agree as a couple, and we are coping with the word of God which is To trust in all situations. He knows I expect his behavior to make it easy for me to trust him, He accepts that without criticism. I know he professes to trust me anyways ,that does not mean I abuse that opportunity. That comes to clarify that, when I see actions that do not allow me to trust easily, I go to God in prayer for clarification especially when it has to do with my marriage. Let me share another real story with you.
Mr Cobby felt his wife was too perfect to be trusted. Perfect people do not exist, so why is his wife pretending to be perfect. She is sneaky, he thought. So they got separated living in different countries. During that period, He met a girl He thought he had fallen in love with. This is the perfect time to let this sneaky woman go. He took every opportunity to make his wife feel she had done something wrong. Like when she called to find out why he hadn't even sent a thank you back to the happy birthday she had sent him on his birthday; he got angry and never called her again. No text, no check up for two months. Not a single word.
She tried in vain to reach him for another two months. She was also being pursued where she was. Remember the ''cable company marriage'' and being taken for granted? The heart grows fonder where it is accepted and loved.
Both Mr Cobby and his wife took each other for granted.
After a year, Mr Cobby realized he still wanted the company of his wife. He convinced her to get back together. They did. And just when they thought they were going to be happy, the wife found all the secrets about this strange girl and Mr Cobby. Her trust was broken. As they were dealing with that, Mr Cobby also found out his wife had also had an affair. He was broken! His trust has also been broken.
They both had to work out rebuilding trust to be able to live together again. How do they do it?
-They both had to ask God to forgive them of their grievous sins
-They had to start with a conscious effort; FORGIVENESS
-They had to have compassion for each other
-They had to ask for the Grace of the Almighty Lord.
They have been able to overcome this challenge, thankfully, they are still married, living happily with their children and chose to share their testimony to save other marriages.
Mr Cobby gave up his right to punish or divorce or humiliate his wife;just like a man named Hosea in the Bible who was married to a prostitute. Hosea reminds us of the unmerited favor and grace we receive from our God.
I don't know how trust has been broken in your marriages or relationships and I am not advocating a free pass for your spouse because healthy relationships are definitely built on trust, accountability and mutual respect. My hope is for this story to open your heart and mind a little bit wider than it already is for more love to flow through it.
If we as humans deserved forgiveness, then it wouldn't be called Grace. Radical forgiveness does not seem humanly possible, but I assure the Grace of God makes it possible . Forgiveness sets you free and makes your healing possible in a relationship.
Some people get stuck in a cycle of mistrust and grudges because they wrongfully think forgiveness and trust are the same thing. Forgiveness is not earned, it is given freely. During the stage of rebuilding trust, it is also necessary to fight the urge of retaliating or punishing. You don't need to trust someone to forgive, but you definitely need to forgive in order to trust again.
The process of rebuilding trust may be painful and slow , but its worth it. Remember, in the end what matters is how well you served God.
We have been granted an extra day by God this year, that's the leap year. Challenge yourself to do something worthwhile with this extra day you have.
#FIXIT
Marriages the Right way and Gods way
Be married for life.
Couples for Christ(CFC)
Written by Rev. Mrs Caroline Dzifa Fumey.
Like I said in one my articles, I still believe trust is earned. My husband believes its a free gift of sacrifice. I believe your question now to me is , ''how are you guys coping?'' or ''are you guys not agreeing as a couple?'' Well, we agree as a couple, and we are coping with the word of God which is To trust in all situations. He knows I expect his behavior to make it easy for me to trust him, He accepts that without criticism. I know he professes to trust me anyways ,that does not mean I abuse that opportunity. That comes to clarify that, when I see actions that do not allow me to trust easily, I go to God in prayer for clarification especially when it has to do with my marriage. Let me share another real story with you.
Mr Cobby felt his wife was too perfect to be trusted. Perfect people do not exist, so why is his wife pretending to be perfect. She is sneaky, he thought. So they got separated living in different countries. During that period, He met a girl He thought he had fallen in love with. This is the perfect time to let this sneaky woman go. He took every opportunity to make his wife feel she had done something wrong. Like when she called to find out why he hadn't even sent a thank you back to the happy birthday she had sent him on his birthday; he got angry and never called her again. No text, no check up for two months. Not a single word.
She tried in vain to reach him for another two months. She was also being pursued where she was. Remember the ''cable company marriage'' and being taken for granted? The heart grows fonder where it is accepted and loved.
Both Mr Cobby and his wife took each other for granted.
After a year, Mr Cobby realized he still wanted the company of his wife. He convinced her to get back together. They did. And just when they thought they were going to be happy, the wife found all the secrets about this strange girl and Mr Cobby. Her trust was broken. As they were dealing with that, Mr Cobby also found out his wife had also had an affair. He was broken! His trust has also been broken.
They both had to work out rebuilding trust to be able to live together again. How do they do it?
-They both had to ask God to forgive them of their grievous sins
-They had to start with a conscious effort; FORGIVENESS
-They had to have compassion for each other
-They had to ask for the Grace of the Almighty Lord.
They have been able to overcome this challenge, thankfully, they are still married, living happily with their children and chose to share their testimony to save other marriages.
Mr Cobby gave up his right to punish or divorce or humiliate his wife;just like a man named Hosea in the Bible who was married to a prostitute. Hosea reminds us of the unmerited favor and grace we receive from our God.
I don't know how trust has been broken in your marriages or relationships and I am not advocating a free pass for your spouse because healthy relationships are definitely built on trust, accountability and mutual respect. My hope is for this story to open your heart and mind a little bit wider than it already is for more love to flow through it.
If we as humans deserved forgiveness, then it wouldn't be called Grace. Radical forgiveness does not seem humanly possible, but I assure the Grace of God makes it possible . Forgiveness sets you free and makes your healing possible in a relationship.
Some people get stuck in a cycle of mistrust and grudges because they wrongfully think forgiveness and trust are the same thing. Forgiveness is not earned, it is given freely. During the stage of rebuilding trust, it is also necessary to fight the urge of retaliating or punishing. You don't need to trust someone to forgive, but you definitely need to forgive in order to trust again.
The process of rebuilding trust may be painful and slow , but its worth it. Remember, in the end what matters is how well you served God.
We have been granted an extra day by God this year, that's the leap year. Challenge yourself to do something worthwhile with this extra day you have.
#FIXIT
Marriages the Right way and Gods way
Be married for life.
Couples for Christ(CFC)
Brilliant
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